Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Dec. 2006

     This was the last Christmas that Dad was able to come to Huntington. Looking at this pic now, I recall he was having great difficulty with mobility and he was hunching over due to pain in his back and legs.  I remember when the doctor told us that he had "Alzheimer's".  I cursed God for allowing this to happen to my lovable, caring, big-hearted buddy.  I immediately began trying to obtain as much knowledge as I could on the subject.  As I began to read about the different stages of this horrid disease, I started crying and somehow moved myself into a state of denial.  I stopped reading info. about anything pertaining to Alzheimer's.  I naively thought, maybe it will go away, maybe the doctor was wrong, maybe Dad can beat this. Its strange how your brain can trick you and go into self preservation mode.
     I just sent two messages to Rick and Sheena.  I told them that origionally I designed this site in hopes of helping someone out there in the vast internet.  I have since realized that someone is "ME".  I have been off my anti-depressants for over a month.  I am so happy to be getting back to myself, instead of feeling like a zombie in one of Bill's horror flicks.  I think this blog is just what I need to work through unresolved issues of pain, anguish, loss and fear.
     If anyone out there should have a loved one who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's.  This is a very helpful link.  For the past two years,  I have been involved in their walk for awareness and I was so happy to have my sister, Sharon join me this last time.  So, here's the link: alz.org